”The word ‘Indian’ seemed to raise a murmur as the crowd listened intently to my younger brother. Mr Bletchley held up his hand and waited for silence to descend again. Mataoka, still gripping my hand, raised it to her other and sank to her knees, her hands pressed tight together and her head bowed in silent prayer.“Everyone knows I was in a band patrolling to the west when the Indians threatened to attack this summer,” Jonathon proceeded. “We came across an Indian, all right,” Jonathon grinned, “Her!”He paused for effect. “And before we could restrain her, she cursed us all to hell and we were all struck down with the most dreadful cramps and pains and all the men but me quickly died!”“I thought you split from that party when they headed north to settle?” Mr Bletchley queried. Clearly Jonathon’s story when he had first returned with Eric and Eliza had been different.“I lied for fear of my life, for I had been cursed, too, and my tongue was not my own,” my brother lied, shrugging at. In addition, his mother's anger, criticism and disdain towards his father led Ariel to believe that being a man was something bad, especially a man like his father. Of course, he couldn't help being like his father, as he was his father's son. As a result, Ariel began to act and look more and more like a girl, until people couldn't tell whether or not he was a boy or a girl. Even his name, Ariel, could be the name of either a boy or a girl.The years that Ariel was the most androgynous were the years when boys usually start noticing girls and wanting to touch them and have sex with them. This was a difficult and painful time for Ariel, as he wasn't sure how boys were supposed to act. His attempts to make girls like him didn't work out too well, and with each rejection, he became more and more insecure. At this time, Ariel developed some very destructive and limiting beliefs about himself, his sexuality, attractiveness and masculinity. It's said that a person's first sexual experience.
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